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If I Did / Saved By A Place

by Renouncer

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1.
If I Did 04:16
If you let me go I'll admit that I buried the money Beneath the sycamore Where the snakeroot grasps at the ivy If you let me go I'll confess that I stole a corolla I picked it from your planter Heard you inside cleaning, singing ABBA If I did even half of what I know it takes To make a break, to leave these chains behind I think I would just about evaporate Cuz what would stay When ocean sheets and double dates And all the other counterweights Of my mind must go If you let me go I'll give up my every accomplice I'll read their names aloud Daniel, Elliott, and Alice If you let me go You're welcome to all of the spoils Once I see you next A heart attack in a Safeway aisle If I did even half of what I know it takes To make a break, to leave these chains behind I think I would just about evaporate Cuz what would stay When incense sticks and roller skates And all the other counterweights Of my mind must go If you let me go I'll drag my thin pale body To the coldest spring And drink until I can be ready
2.
A child collapsed to the floor of the station He gasped and writhed around on the ground His mother donned her cap Took his head into her lap And she held him as he slowly calmed down As he hyperventilated into a paper bag I wished that I could help or show I cared I scrambled for the words But only came up empty Anyways, he had his mother right there All my uselessness had got me thinking That I'd somehow missed out I don't know what I felt guiltier about A few years and change Brought me back to that same platform With the suits and students shaking off the day Out on the street No bounds, no bonds for me I walked down to where the buskers always play And that was enough To make me wanna pack my shit up Damn near fooled me into thinking That this light and sound could dazzle down What I wished to forget And so I felt so good I struck up a conversation With a girl who sang and played guitar alone But with my broken speech We could barely meet in the middle So she went home and I kept moving on my own Yes, I wandered through the alleys Hopping puddles and dodging cars Lingering in the warmth that leaked out from the bars Till I turned the lock On this antiseptic shoebox Mine for now but not for long What a fool I'd been in thinking That to me this night belonged And later I stood with the singer in that station But when she spoke I saw she had that child's face She said "The only thing that's dumber Than thinking everyone needs your saving Is thinking you'd be saved by a place"

about

Two songs that were written for Dilettante Dawn but didn't make their way onto the record, as much as I liked them. I wanted to make sure they got a proper release so figured I'd just put them out as their own self-contained single. Hope you enjoy -- more Renouncer in the works as we speak

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released April 2, 2024

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about

Renouncer Seattle, Washington

Born on an artichoke farm in Iowa, Renouncer's love of music began at a young age when he saw Philip Glass trip and fall while entering a Costco. Picking up his grandfather's PRS Silver Sky at the tender age of 26, his passion for punk rock led him to NYU's Tisch School of the Arts, where he networked for 7 years before growing tired of Manhattan's humdrum parochiality. He now lives in Seattle. ... more

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